To: HIM
From: A selfish heart
Father, thank you. Thank you for the strength You've given me to wake up each morning with an expectant, patient heart. I was not excited to return back to school after Christmas break and You knew that. You knew that and carried me.
It's Thursday and I'm sleepy and ready for Friday. Tonight I lay here on my bed with tears in my eyes realizing the depth of my selfishness. And Father I ask for forgiveness. I actually dreaded returning to school and as I reflect on why I find only selfish reasons. It's hard work to plan 8 hours of 20 little people's lives, getting up early when it's 10 degrees outside isn't my first choice as part of a wake-up routine, and patience with various children's home lives is hard to attain on my own.
I pray these selfish reasons would somehow shift and become reasons why I am expectant to return to school each day. I pray I would daily take up my cross and follow You. I pray my heart would be filled with Your love and that out of Your fullness You would overflow onto each person I come in contact with at school. For Yours is the Kingdom, the power, the glory, forever.
Forgive me for thinking this life is about pleasing me. This life is about You. This life is about making sure every soul has the opportunity to meet You, fall in Love with You, and follow You. Thank you for choosing me, my selfish heart and all.
Love,
A forgiven heart
