Increase.

This week, as hard as this is to say, has gotten the best of me. I can't even put my finger on what exactly has been so aggravating...which makes it even more obnoxious. I am the type of person who wants to do things well, and do it well the first time. I admit, I don't feel I have done my job well this week. I have lacked patience (which is needed when the people you hang out with are only 5, 6, and 7) and felt like I have simply been going through the motions. I have gotten upset with things that in reality aren't that big of a deal and have started many days this week feeling aggravated. Ultimately, I have been relying on my own strength and motivation. I, on my own, am just not enough.

Thank goodness for these simple truths:

*When I am weak, He is strong.

*When I spend more time in the Word, I have a greater understanding of God's character, am able to seek understanding and wisdom from the Holy Spirit, and am refined into who He wants me to be.

*When I spend time with Him the fruits of the Spirit in my life increase and the ways of the world in me decrease.

*I am not but I know "I AM." (God said to Moses, "I AM WHO I AM" - Exodus 3:14)

I have learned to enjoy the stages of refinement. For as a silversmith refines metal, I am being refined by God. A silversmith goes through multiple stages to bring the impurities out of the silver. He leaves the silver in the heat for just enough time before it is destroyed. He brings the silver out from the heat and scrapes off the impurities. Then, once again, puts it back in the heat for just enough time before it is destroyed. This process is repeated until the silver is pure and void of all impurities. Surely, this process takes time and patience for the silversmith. This is exactly what it's like to be refined by God. Refinement is difficult but in the end gives the purest results.

Daily, I am learning to give up the ways of the world and trade them for the ways of the Kingdom. Kingdom ways are not always the most popular and could actually seem crazy or confusing but I know I AM. I know I AM and know that His ways are higher than mine. I know I AM and know that He loves me with a love that rattles the universe. I know I AM and know He calls me beloved, beautiful, precious, and wonderfully made. For me, this is enough to follow Him. For me, this is enough to live a Kingdom life. For me, this is why I want to be the purest of pure. I want to be like Him, glorify Him with all my might, and be rid of myself because His ways are higher than mine.

So, Father would you rid me of the ways of the world and refine me to be the woman You desire. Rid my heart and soul of gossip and slander and increase my heart to become more understanding. Break my heart for what breaks Yours. Let my heart be full of compassion and let me be quick to love the "unlovable". Let the Fruits of Your Spirit increase in me. For thine is the Kingdom, the power, the glory, forever. Amen.